A {Spot} in the {Dirt}

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The big brown tabby tom was walking through the marsh, not even trying to hide. He knew he shouldn't want to anyways, for it was his own territory.

He didn't want ShadowHeart to notice that he left, but he knew that SpottedStar did. Of course she did, for they both assigned this meeting. He wanted them to talk alone.

He sat down, his ears pricked. He waited, his paws kneading the ground with impatience.

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Same Old Fears

Spottedstar padded through the marsh, her accustomed paws not bothered by the swampy ground. Her mouth was a grim line as she looked ahead of her where Dirtfur stood. He had gotten there before her, and her paws almost wanted to turn around and walk away. The Gathering would start later that night, and she had to be sure to make it on time. The patched she-cat padded closer until she was a tail length away from the tom warrior. She flicked an ear. "Well, we're out of camp now. Care to speak your mind?"

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DirtFur's ears flicked a bit, one of them still seemed to be half-way down. He was uneasy, not sure if SpottedStar would even listen to her.

"Sure. I just want to say, I really didn't mean to. Sure.. it seems like I did. I don't expect you to forgive me, for I know you won't.. I just want you to know that I didn't exactly mean it. I didn't want to kill her.. just.. make her remember me.. but then.. Tanglestar.."

His head suddenly drooped. He had to try to keep his cool.

"I wouldn't be surprised if you exiled me, which you should. If I stay here, I would just cause a war between two clans, just because of me. Right?"

He shifted his head upwards, staring at his leader.

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Try To Find The Words

Spottedstar rolled her shoulders uneasily as she thought about the situation. "I'll say it now; I don't understand what was going through your head. What you're saying doesn't make sense to me. Maybe it does to you, but not for me." She shook her head.

"I do know that I don't want to exile you from the Clan. It's not that I'm trying to pretend that nothing happened, but I'd still hate to have to banish you. And whether you stay with us or not, there will still be a war if Tanglestar gives to word." Her amber eyes glanced up at the moon, then back to the dark warrior.

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He drooped his head, and sighed. He didn't know how to explain what he meant. He raised his head, and tried to explain quickly, for he knew it was the Gathering tonight.

"ShadowHeart and I were waiting for the patrol of TangleStar's, when all of a sudden, StarEyes was there. She was taunting me, and I told her not to attack me and stuff, and then she swiped her paw across my muzzle. I defended myself, tussled, had my paw at her throat. I was asking her if she would stop, for I didn't even hold her down that hard.

Then, TangleStar came. She was furious, taunting me with the MoonShine incident, which made me loose my cool even more. I unsheathed my claws, and went to lunge at TangleStar, which, I do not defend that action, and I guess I scraped at StarEye's neck... That was the part I didn't mean to!

I can't control where my paw goes, although I should of known, I know, I know! But SpottedStar, you got to believe me!"

He basically pleaded it, his eyes dancing with worry.

He couldn't help but take a pawstep towards SpottedStar, and lick her cheek with a thank you, with the last part she said. But then he froze.

"But.. Couldn't she stop.. if I left?"

He whimpered slightly.

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Stands Hard As A Stone

Spottedstar listened to him quietly, trying to see the situation through the warrior's eyes. She could see somewhat. Enough to understand. "If what you say is true, then I believe you when you say it wasn't intentional. But the fact that Stareyes lays dead still stands, and Tanglestar won't forgive or forget it." The leader tried to smile, but worry and stress over the future kept it small.

"Think, now. Just because you leave the Clan- saying that you did-, would Tanglestar still forgive ShadowClan? When she came to our camp, she didn't just blame you and Shadowheart. She blamed all of ShadowClan. Tanglestar is very close to her Clanmates. She'll want revenge." Her whiskers twitched. Of course, Spottedstar would probably react the same way it the ThunderClan leader's position. But that wasn't the matter at hand here.

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The tom dipped his head in respect, in understanding.

"I understand. But is there any way to stop all of this?"

His eyes clouded with grief when he rose his head up once more. His tail tip twitched with anticipation, getting uneasy. He wasn't sure if he should talk about this exactly.

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Plans For A Funeral

Spottedstar shrugged. "What would you suggest doing? Talking some sense into Tanglestar? You've already tried that, and she'd kill you for going on ThunderClan territory next time." Her claws sank in and out from her paws. "If things come to the worst case scenario, being an all-out war between our Clans, the only thing we could do is fight. But maybe she won't even attack. It's a long shot, but she may not attempt it. We outnumber her Clan by a good amount. If she thinks clearly, she'll see that an attack wouldn't work."

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An idea popped in his mind, and he looked at her.

"What about the gathering? I know I probably shouldn't go, but before it starts or something... you could try to talk? It is forbidden for cats to fight on the night of th--"

He trailed off, his voice choking. He couldn't believe he was going to say that, did he break the warrior code?

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Secret Whispers

Spottedstar blinked slowly. "I could try, but talking never goes well between Tanglestar and I. Besides, she'd probably blow up the situation to an even bigger mess. Soon we'd have all the Clans against us, and one rivalry is enough for now." She swished her ginger-patched tail as she tried to think.

"Perhaps we should stick to our ways- keeping quiet about the whole thing."

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DirtFur gave a soft nod, and looked at his paws.

"SpottedStar.. did I break the warrior code? Since of the.. truce?"

His eyes pleaded with honestly as he glanced at her. All he wanted was the truth, all he wanted was for people to tell him that it would be okay, that he still belonged to ShadowClan, but he knew that wouldn't happen. All he was now was a cold-hearted murderer.

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No Straight Answers

Spottedstar would have raised an eyebrown if she could have as she looked back at the tom. "In what way? Killing Moonshine or Stareyes? Fervently pestering Tanglestar and her Clan? What do you mean?" Her eyes narrowed as she tried to understand. She could name a lot of ways Dirtfur had managed to break the warrior code over the last several moons, so it was hard for her to pin-point exactly what he was talking about.

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The way she was speaking with all of these things, made him think that he broke it in too many ways. He was no longer like a warrior, more like a tom who didn't care or appreciate the warrior code, which he realized, crouching low to the ground.

"The Truce.. of tonight.. since.. I.. I killed StarEyes. I mean.. it wasn't that long ago..."

He muttered, staring at the ground.

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What's Right Or Wronge?

Spottedstar twitched her whiskers, partly disgusted by the tom's sorry behavior. "What happened to Stareyes was not tonight. Enough time has passed since the incident so that you did not break the truce. However, she mewed, adding emphesis on the last word, "no warrior should ever kill another. I know it was an accident on your part, but her death was still a tragic, ah, oversight."

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DirtFur rose, and dipped his head.

"Fine. Thank you for your honesty, that is all I wanted."

He quivered his whiskers, and turned. He was going to pad off, but spoke first.

"SpottedStar, do you dislike me even more? Do you not trust me that much no more? Or is it all down the hole, not trusting me no longer, and hating me?"

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